Family

In our culture, starting a family has remained the most popular way of life up to today, although it comes with a lot of difficulties. If we think it through well, we can distinguish several subsystems within the unit, e.g. parental, couple, and child subsystems. Alliances can form among members, and conflicts can also arise. These different dynamics determine the whole system, so it is very important for every subsystem to be on an at least adequate level, so family members feel good and the family functions and carries out its roles.

That sounds nice, of course, but in reality it often happens that family members' different personality traits, values, habits, and ideas clash, which leads to tension, misunderstanding, and arguments. A very popular topic in psychology today is also family transgenerational effects, which helps map how emotional influences and behavior patterns received in childhood show up in adulthood and in our relationships. After letting go of past hurts, it is worth turning toward the present and learning adaptive behavioral and emotional responses, that promote functionality in a balanced family life.

Psychologists can help a lot in making it possible for you to live a full family life even if you want to process the experiences from your family of origin, and also if you want to learn to function properly in the family you have built. It is worth thinking carefully about what kind of counseling format you would like to involve external help in, because you do not have to come to us on your own with your difficulties.

Have you heard about family therapy?

In family therapy

• anyone can be present from your family; the most common format is when parents and children take part in the therapy, but others can also be involved, e.g. grandparents

• typically two therapists are available to you, so they can map out your situation as accurately and objectively as possible while helping each other in the work

• several goals can be set, e.g. understanding the deeper dynamics; dealing with a current problem; or resolving a crisis situation

• we disrupt the existing system, and try to create a new one in order to change the faulty way of functioning

• strategies, solution methods are developed together so that after therapy you can bridge difficulties on your own

It is already a challenge to keep the different interests and views of the individuals within a family on one track over many decades. On top of that, families are exposed to the hardships of social, cultural, and economic changes. No wonder most of us face smaller or bigger bumps while trying to balance our various roles and responsibilities. Ask for help in individual, couple, or family form if you feel that keeping this complex, intricate system under control is beyond you.

Frequently asked questions

What should we do if a family member does not want to come to therapy?

It is worth starting the process with the others, because if one part of the system changes, that often nudges the absent member out of the deadlock too.

How long does a family therapy session usually take?

Family therapy sessions are typically longer than individual counseling, usually taking 90 minutes.

How often do we need to go to family therapy for effective change?

In most cases, biweekly sessions are recommended, so the family has time to try out in practice the new solutions learned during the sessions.

What should we prepare for the first family therapy session?

No special preparation is needed, it is enough if everyone brings their own point of view and an openness to change.